We all have dreams.
Dreams of what we’d like to do in the future. Things we want to achieve in the next ten years, twenty years, or once we retire. Things that we add to the ‘Bucket List.’
Dreams that put a smile on our face when we dare to let our minds drift for just a moment. The one we keep hidden away, fearing they’ll never come true if we say them out loud.
However, dreams without action will never be anything but dreams.
They’ll stay just as they are—dancing across our mind when we least expect it—teasing us with their silent words You could have, should have, would have but you didn’t.
Some dreams are beyond our reach, or are they?
Could the only thing holding you back from reaching for those dreams be fear?
Fear of Failure
What if you try and fail? What if you put everything you have towards it and it doesn’t work out? What if…?
Fear of Judgement
What will other people think? What will they say?
Fear of Success
What if I step into the light and fall on my face? What if I succeed and can’t handle it?
These are all legitimate fears we often face, and they shouldn’t be taken lightly. You may have been told you need to Fight Your Fear or Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway, but I prefer a slightly different approach.
I believe you need to look at what you are thinking. To find the thoughts that are preventing you from doing what you want to do and put it down on paper. Write it all down and keep writing until you have nothing left.
Fear likes the darkness which is why it resides in the safety of our minds. Writing it down sheds light on it and takes away its power.
The fear you are feeling right now—the fear that is holding you back—is merely an emotion created by your thoughts.
You are creating the fear, no one else.
You and only you!
So Now What?
If you want to move through the fear towards your dream, sit with the fear and have a discussion with it. (If you’re in public, keep it to yourself, you won’t want anyone to witness this.)
Look at the fear you are dealing with from a different perspective.
Fear of Failure
Is there a possibility of failure? Of course, there is. Anything worth doing comes with some degree of risk. But wouldn’t you prefer to take the leap and say you tried instead of playing it safe and spending the rest of your life wondering if you could have succeeded?
“What if I fall? Oh, but my darling, what if you fly?”
― Erin Hanson
Fear of Judgement
Fear of judgement is a big one. The fear of what others think of you can stop you in your tracks. It can keep you ‘where you belong’ and keep you from ‘getting too big for your britches.’ This is also the place where Imposter Syndrome rears its ugly head.
Other people make their dreams come true but not you. You’re a nobody. No one wants to listen to you. You’re probably not smart enough anyway so you stay right where you are and be grateful for what you have honey.
What you need to understand and believe with all your heart is what people think of you is not your concern. I’ll say that again a little bit louder.
What people think of you is not your concern!
You’re doing the best you can, and that is enough. You’re stretching which means you’re growing. Most people couldn’t care less what you are doing yet you’re assuming they do. So tell those negative and judgemental voices in your head to mind it’s own business and to Shut the hell up!
Fear of Success
This is a strange one, isn’t it? Who wouldn’t want to succeed, after all, isn’t that the point?
Well, it depends on what success means to you. Does your dream involve financial success? Fame? What if you succeed and can’t handle it? What if success comes with publicity and you’re an introvert? What if you can’t bear the thought of all the hoopla that success may bring?
It all comes back to remembering that fear is an emotion created by your thoughts. You don’t need to fight it. You don’t need to ignore it, push it aside or cover it in chocolate—you just need to look at the thought that created it and see it for what it is.
Ask yourself what’s the worse that can happen and write it down.
It’s quite possibly not as bad as you made it out to be.
Want to read my full story? Taming Crazy – Confessions and Lessons is available at all online retailers.
